Friday, June 17, 2005

Early Years Remembered

Just a reminder that this blog will be mostly about sex so if that subject offends you (and I do feel sorry for you if that's indeed the case!) please don't read any further! I'm going to begin by writing about my earliest recollections of things of a sexual nature.

I was born in 1940 in Santa Rosa California, which is about 50 miles north of San Francisco. My dad worked for the city and my mom was a stay at home housewife. I have one younger sister Karen who was born in 1941. I can't remember when I first became interested in sex but sometimes I think I was born with a hard on! Actually I've heard that is possible. Some of us come out ready for action!

I remember as a little boy I was very interested in my sister Karen's body as well as the the bodies of other little girls in the neighborhood. In particular I wondered why they had had that little crack between her legs and I had a weenie and nut sack. I suppose I asked my mom why that was but I don't actually remember doing that. Any time I could get a little girl to pull her panties down and show me her crack I would do just that. Of course I had no idea at the time how much pleasure what was inside that crack would bring me starting just after the time I reached puberty! The caption on the picture at left shows the little girl saying to the little boy "With this I'm going to control your life!" Ah truer words were never spoken!

I also remember asking my mom at an early age, probably 5 or 6, just out of my bath and completely naked, my little boner in hand and worst of all in the presence of my aunt, why my little weenie sometimes stuck straight out. Both my mom and aunt got really embarrassed and laughed hysterically. My mom finally said it's just something that happens. Of course when they started laughing I got as embarrassed as they did for asking that question even though it seemed so innocent at the time. That was most likely the last time I asked my mom anything regarding my sexual anatomy!

Another time my sister Karen asked me to show my penis to her girlfriend who didn't have a brother and apparently hadn't ever seen a "weenie". I did so on the condition that they both pull down their panties and let me see their cracks. I remember I sprung a boner and they both giggled at it. That probably was my first game of "You show me yours and I'll show you mine!" Yet another early memory is being in the second grade at school and finding a hole in my pants pocket where I could feel my penis and make it get stiff during class. I have a vague memory of actually pulling it out of my pants under my desk about that time too. It's a good thing the teacher didn't see that!

I guess I was gradually discovering that little thing between my legs was good for more than peeing. It was a toy I loved to play with even though I had no idea at the time how much pleasure it would really give me in the years to come. I wish I would have discovered what rubbing that little sucker up and down would do for me much more early on! Those wasted years before I discovered the wonderful sport of jacking off!

I can't remember when I first heard the word "fuck" but it was fairly early in my childhood years, maybe 6 or 7. I knew that word meant something nasty but had no idea what. I said it once at home and my dad washed my mouth out with soap, a common punishment for kids using profanity in those days. Not too long later an older neighborhood kid named Roger Davis told me that fucking was "the nastiest thing in the world"! He said it was when a boy or man "sticks his weenie in a girl's crack". For some reason I thought he was talking about the crack in her rear end, her buttocks. I wasn't even visualizing anal sex, rather I pictured it as sticking a penis between a girl's buttocks like a hot dog wiener in a bun! Talk about being unclear on the concept! It did sound mighty nasty though and I'm sure I immediately got a stiff little weenie. I wanted to try it as soon as I could talk some little girl into it!

In school I started started fantasizing doing my misconception of that nasty thing called fucking to the all the cute little girls in my class. I guess I was in the third or fourth grade by then. The cutest girl in the class was a red head sweetie pie named Lily Fischer and she was in most of my first sex fantasies. She lived right down the street from us and I had a crush on her even before I heard about that nasty fucking thing.  Oh my God I would have just loved to FUCK Lily,  more so after I got clued in on the right way to do it, MUCH more so after we both reached puberty. Lily was definitely a babe, a fantasy fuck for all of boys, all throughout our elementary and high school years. Funny but I haven't thought about Lily in many years. As I recall she was the only girl in my graduating class that dropped out of school because she got pregnant. I remember her boyfriend was an older guy, already out of school, who drove a ratted out black pickup truck. We all suspected that he was the guy who popped Lily's cherry and envied him for that. Some guys have all of the fucking luck! But I digress, let me get back to those earlier years!  My sister Karen's best friend Dana was another cute little neighbor girl I wanted to do that nasty fucking thing to.

One afternoon when my parents and Karen were out I  I invited Karen's friend Dana to come in for a glass of Kool Aid. I asked her if she knew what the word "fuck" meant. She said no so I told her it was lots of fun and that I would show her if she took off all of her clothes and promised not ever to tell Karen, her mom and dad or anybody else. Surprisingly Dana said okay and we both got naked. We laid on her bed and I got on top of her put my hard little pecker between her buns. It felt good but I had no idea what to do next! She giggled and said "Is that really what fuck means?" and I said yes that's what Roger Davis told me. She asked why people did something so silly and I told her it was just because it was so nasty. After a couple of minutes Dana told me to get that weenie out of her butt and get off of her.

A month or so later I mentioned to Roger that I had "fucked" Dana Fusco. He didn't believe me and when I described putting my weenie between her buns he laughed like crazy and called me an idiot. Roger then  straightened me out about which "crack" he was talking about and I admitted to him that okay I really didn't fuck Dana if that's what "fuck" meant. I told him he should have explained it better in the first place and told me which "crack" he was talking about. At the time I couldn't picture even  my little weenie fitting in THAT little crack which I had yet to explore! Roger never let me forget my misunderstanding and for a while I was the butt of many jokes among the older and definitely more knowledgeable about sex boys in the neighborhood. I went back and explained to Dana what "fucking" really meant and she told me there was no way she would EVER let a boy do anything so nasty to her!

I couldn't imagine how a weenie would fit in that other crack down there! One afternoon at Roger's house we got a chance to do a little exploration of that mysterious place! Roger's mom and dad were gone and he invited a neighbor girl about our age in to watch TV. Before I knew it he was asking her to pull down her panties and show us her "crack" as a condition before we let watch his TV. To my surprise she readily did what he asked! Kids can be so innocent until they get caught doing what they are not supposed to! Roger told the girl to sit down on the couch and spread her legs so we could see inside and she did that too.

 It looked strange in that mysterious place that I had seen the outside of many times on my sister but never the inside. It didn't look like a weenie, even a little weenie like mine would fit inside that place! I couldn't imagine how a big weenie, like I'd seen on older boys and men in the locker room at the city swimming pool, especially when that weenie got stiff, would fit in there! We did discover what looked like a tiny stiff penis at the top of the crack. It was of course her clitoris! We didn't know that name at the time and certainly didn't realize that she was obviously sexually aroused just like we were.

Remember that this was way back in the very innocent late 1940's! Kids had absolutely no access to porn. Few adults even had that access! Porn existed under the counter, as I was to find out later but it was still illegal and rarely concealed in family homes. My dad didn't even subscribe to any pin up magazines which didn't show anything but tits and ass anyway. No public hair, no genitals, absolutely no explicit sex in men's magazines of that era! Even nudist magazines were prohibited from showing full frontal nudity! Pubic areas were airbrushed to make it looking like there was nothing down there! It looked like your genitals just disappeared as you got older! Talk about keeping us sexually curious little bastards confused about anatomy! You got your sex education where you could find it...and that information was obviously  wrong much of the time! Those were the days...NOT!

The little girl at Roger's house was soon getting tired of our exploration of her privates and pulled our panties up. She did want to see our wieners though since she had no brothers. We told her we'd show her our dicks if she took the rest of her clothes off. We all got completely naked. Roger and I of course had boners by that time! Our new friend stared in amazement and then giggled at the sight of our stiff little peckers. I think she even took a feel of Roger's dick at his request. We asked her if she knew what "fucking" meant. She said no and we told her. Roger (always the nasty little bugger!) asked her if she wanted to try it.  She said no and that she was now ready to watch TV so we all put our clothes back on. "Show and tell!" was over for that afternoon.

Looking back it's a good thing we didn't go any further! Roger and I didn't really understand what fucking really involved. We'd never had climaxes and didn't know that thrusting was involved, only that we were supposed to somehow stick our dicks in that crack down there. If we had done that and the girl had got hurt or told her parents, the shit would probably have hit the fan! Roger tried to get the girl to come back into his house when his parents were gone a couple of times later. She wisely told him no. I can't recall that girl's name at all but have a vivid remember of her giving us a graphic anatomy lesson to remember that afternoon.

I already knew that babies grew inside of a woman (my mom confirmed that to me) but I couldn't believe it when my sex obsessed buddy Roger Davis told me he just find out that you had to "fuck" a woman to make her have a baby. He said some stuff squirted out of the penis after you fucked her and that stuff fertilized the egg inside the woman. I asked him where the baby came out of and he told me the same place where you fucked her. Holy Shit! And I had thought a weenie wouldn't even fit in there, let alone a baby come out! I really thought Roger was bullshitting me, trying to make me the butt of another joke. I just couldn't believe it, couldn't imagine my mom and dad doing that nasty fucking thing! I asked my mom if women just naturally had babies without doing anything and how come only married women had babies (I was pretty naive there huh?) Mom said I was too young to really understand that stuff and that my dad would talk to me later.

Later on I got my mom's permission to check out an ancient but legendary among us curious kids book called "Being Born" (with a picture of some kids riding a horse on the cover!) from the Santa Rosa library. I took it to school where it was a big hit with my male classmates...until an uptight female teacher caught us all huddled around it and took it away for the rest of the day. She did give it back then and told me to take it home and leave it there. As I recall there were no actual photos in the book but I believe there were full frontal drawings of a completely nude man and woman. I'd seen my dad naked so the hairy penis was no surprise but I'd never seen my mom or any other post pubescent female naked and I was so naive that I didn't even know that women had hair covering the public area! I pictured women with just the bare crack down there like little girls had, maybe a little bigger. Hey women didn't have hair on their chests! How was I to know there was hair DOWN THERE? This naivety must seem terribly strange to people born since full frontal nudity in men's magazines, pornography and the internet in particular gave  young people a much more vivid and accurate depiction of male and female anatomy and explicit sexuality at a very early age.

Sadly there were no explicit drawings of fucking or any other sexual activity in "Being Born" but the text made it clear that the man had to put his "penis" in the woman's "vagina" to engage in something called "sexual intercourse"...all new words to me but I figured that last one was the polite term for "fucking"! It also said that the man had to have an "erection" to have intercourse. I understood what that was. In fact I'm sure I had one of those "erection" thingies as we looked at that book. The book also made clear that "sexual intercourse" was necessary to produce a baby so Roger Davis wasn't bullshitting me after all. I still couldn't imagine mom and dad ever doing anything like that, strange because I myself wanted to do it in the worst way! That "Being Born" book was my first and only official pre-puberty sex education, probably the only official sex education of generations of kids in our town. There was still much to learn!

Other juicy tidbits began to flow in from various sources. I heard dirty stories about girls sucking guys' weenies and this sounded even more nasty (and fun!) than fucking to me! Then I heard there were women called "whores" who would let you fuck them or would suck your weenie for money. You could also buy "rubbers' that you could put on your penis so you could fuck a woman all you wanted without planting a baby inside her. We found a used rubber in the park one day. Sometime later a neighborhood kid found some sealed ones hidden in his mom and dad's bedroom chest of drawers. Since I was the oldest one in our group and had the biggest dick I got elected to try the condom on. It was still WAY to big for my hard but still small prepubescent weenie!  Sex was definitely starting to sound like fun now! I couldn't wait until I got old enough to start fucking the girls with or without a rubber and having my weenie sucked!

Next time I'll talk about the greatest discovery of my young life, probably the greatest discovery of any young lad's life. That is of course discovering the wonderful sport of jacking off! Over fifty years later I vividly remember that day like it was only yesterday! Needless to say I'm still practicing what I learned on that historic day! Hey thanks for reading this crap, goodbye for now!

1 comment:

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