Monday, October 10, 2005

Teacher Got a Boner! We All Got Boners!


This picture has been all over the web lately. It looks like teacher has a boner! Well who can blame him with the way the girls dress nowadays? Those two cuties at right are enough to give any teacher (or any non teacher!) a boner! Of course it could be it's the dude on the left that's giving him the woody...but that's a whole different story, eh? Teachers are only human though. I can just see it if yours truly the Horny Old Guy was a teacher in a modern classroom! Those sweet young things in their tight jeans and bare midriffs would definitely be having a boner inducing effect on even my ancient but still functioning dong!



Actually if you click on this teacher's picture and look close at that "boner" it looks like someone has been playing a joke on this guy with Photoshop or another image editing program. Either that or his pecker is located in an unusual place on his body! I saw another picture of Arnold Schwarznegger holding up a girl and it looked like Big Arnie had sprung a woody too but looking close, it also proved to be a phony pic, not that it wouldn't be typical behavior of our horny "Governator" to do such a thing! Like I said before...boners just happen dude...and at my age I enjoy each and every one of them, even the embarrassing ones!

Sometimes the old pecker truly has a mind of it's own! All of us guys have gotten boners when we didn't want them. I've lost track of all of my unwanted boners! One of my more recent automatic boners was at age 62! It was at my last company physical before I retired. I had the first female doctor I've ever had in my life and she was cute and smelled good. I've always had fantasies about things like this and when she told me to drop my shorts so she could feel my nuts for a hernia (or whatever!), I had about 3/4 of a full fledged boner. It popped right out in her face when I pulled down my shorts. She was cool about it though and said didn't comment at all. As hot as she looked I'm sure it wasn't the first male patient woody she'd encountered.  I was embarrassed as hell though, speechless with a face as red as a beet. I told a buddy at work about it and soon it was on the bulletin board that Mikey got a boner in front of the lady doc.




Another of my most embarrassing boners came at a nude beach near Santa Cruz several years ago. I was laying on my beach towel talking to a nice woman my age that I had just met there and her stark naked teenage daughter joined us. If you would have seen that daughter...WOW!...well she was enough to make any male of any age spring a big fat boner! I tried to think of everything non sexual in the world but "Junior" was soon standing at attention if you know what I mean and I think you do! It was definitely the wrong place and the wrong time for a boner though! Mama was NOT amused and both her and the daughter babe got up and moved. Oh well...boners just happen lady! What more can I say?




More than at any other time in your life unwanted boners can really be a problem when you are a horny teenager. You just have to fantasize for an instant about Mary Alice Jensen's sweet young body sitting across from you in your History class and (BOING!) you've got the mother of all stiffies. That's just about the time the old teacher Mrs. Culbertson would call you up in front of the classroom to give your oral report on Andrew Jackson. "What are you people giggling about?" asked the teacher as the red faced student named Mike with the bulge in his pants attempted to think about ANYTHING but Mary Alice Jensen's anatomy and give his report. Nothing like being truly embarrassed to make you lose your woody quickly though. You'll of course be needled about this incident for the rest of your high school days and beyond.


"Boners just happen...dude!" Hmmm...looks like not much has changed since I was a horny young lad! Those bikinis and thongs must cause a lot of unwanted young wood!

Our local outdoor public swimming pool was another place where "Junior" used to spring to attention without warning at the wrong time and in the wrong place. I mean all those girls in their swimming suits! WOW! Talk about like being a kid in a candy store...and yeah I wanted to EAT all of that candy! Thank God I was in the water most of the time. On several occasions the old pecker was sticking out from my trunks like a flagpole while I was out of the water though. I mean some woodies just won't go away until you at least give them some exercise. A quick jack off session in the toilet stall in the locker room was the only way I could get rid of some of those humongous hard ons caused by looking at and fantasizing about those swimming pool sweeties.

The only problem was making my way from the pool area to the locker room without people staring and giggling about the big bulge in my trunks. I eventually started jacking off before I went in the pool. That helped somewhat but not entirely. As a teenager it of course takes very little time to "re-charge your batteries". Just one look at some particularly attractive cleavage even after you'd just jacked off and it was "BOING!" all over again! That's just the way it is amigo!





I even sprung a couple of totally unwanted and embarrassing woodies in the high school shower room while fantasizing about all that young naked poontang in the girls shower room on the other side of the wall. Oh what I would have given back then to have some of Superman's x-ray vision. Just one thought of what Trudy Nielson or Carol Kaminsky would look like naked in that shower room next door was enough to get my young pecker hard and throbbing in the blink of an eye! That's probably the worst place to spring a boner...in front of a bunch of other guys with no place to hide the damn thing. I think I'd rather spring a woody in front of my mother or at a nude beach although I've done both of those things too! VERY embarrassing to say the least!


I know for a fact I wasn't alone in springing a woody in the high school or any other shower room though. I'm not saying that they are common but they do happen from time to time. In most cases they have nothing to do with your sexual identity either! The old pecker sometimes has a mind of it's own! You don't even have to think about pussy to make it stand at attention! Boners just happen dude!


Oh by the way I still regularly spring boners in the shower as the above picture demonstrates. Of course when you are alone there is nothing unwanted or embarrassing about them and in my case the boners usually lead to a nice shower wanking session. No use wasting a boner just because you're in the shower!!


There is  a great website called AWKWARD BONERS devoted to those unwanted and embarrassing erections all of us guys experience from time to time. Above is one of the hundreds of candid photos they have collected. All I can say is I hope those two girls straddling the dude aren't members of his immediate family! You know what I am saying' homie?

Yup folks unwanted boners just happen, especially when you are a young whippersnapper but as you can see they still pop up occasionally when you are an old fart like me. Oh well I guess I'll start worrying when I DON'T get boners and fortunately there is even Viagra for that eventuality. Thank you Jesus for that wonderful invention! Enough about boners and everything else for today! As always thanks for reading this horseshit! See you next time!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Teachers do get boners! I speak from experience! I think you are right about this photo being a phony though.

Anastasia Beaverhousen said...

wow, cool blog! I'll keep it in mind I love experience ;)
Thanks for visiting my pussyblog.

Biker & Teacher said...

Thank goodness; I am not a man!

As a female teacher; I do not have to worry about that getting a boner. I just insert my remote-wireless vibrator and I am ready to gooooooo ooooh ahhhhhh!smiling

The Biker and I will come back and read more!

The Teacher

Paul said...

It's interesting how intriguing it is to talk about getting 'forbidden' boners in these situations - Horny Old Guy getting one due to a stunning teenage girl, much to her mother's chagrain, and male teachers as a result of the teen girls in class. Stunning teen girls give men boners. Fact.