Friday, December 16, 2005

My Twenties (Part 2) Love and Marriage...and Divorce!

Continuing my life story...we're now back in the summer of 1963. I had just turned 23. The relationship with my good neighbor and fuck buddy June was over and I was in a new apartment. It was back to jacking myself off for sexual release and I was doing lots of that! When I wasn't getting laid or sucked off it was still at least a once a day habit back then.

In the fall of that year I decided to go back to school part time while I continued to work a swing (afternoon) shift at Travis Air Force Base in Fairfield. I enrolled in a community college and it was there that I met Margaret. She was a shy young blond girl with glasses who sat next to me in my California History Class. She was 18 and had just graduated from high school the previous June. We started talking a little before class and soon became sort of friendly. She was hardly a hottie but she was cute and thoughts of getting in her panties were soon floating through my dirty mind. I was also jacking off to her, a sure sign that I was "in lust"! The first time I asked her out,to a weekend movie, she told me no. I asked her if she had a boyfriend and she said something like "Not anymore!" so I knew I still had a chance. I finally talked her into lunch at the nearby McDonald's after class one day and a couple weekends later I took her to a drive in movie on our first date. I still remember the movie was "Fun in Acapulco" with Elvis, who Margaret just loved!

My hopes for quickly getting into Margaret's panties quickly got dashed though. In spite of already had a boyfriend (or so she said!) she turned out to be a virgin and in no hurry to lose her virginity. It was just like with my high school girlfriend Vicki and my El Paso jail bait girlfriend Carolyn all over again. Slow going! Lots of going home with sore nuts and jacking off after our dates! That first night at the drive in, she wouldn't even let me kiss her during the movies. Feeling her titties was out of the question and yeah I tried that too! I guess she didn't want to miss a second of Elvis! Even when I took her home all I got was a quickie kiss and thank you. But Margaret was nice...she was sweet...I was willing to wait awhile for sex..and it wasn't too long until I felt that nice feeling of being in love again.

Margaret and I met everyday on campus and began to date regularly. I worked afternoons so that limited us to Saturday and Sunday nights for dates. I really looked forward to those weekends! She became a regular visitor to my apartment on weekends and we were soon making out on my couch and then on my bed. The kissing got more passionate and prolonged. I vividly remember the first time she let me take her bra off and how lovely her firm young tits looked. She had the nicest breasts...medium sized but with real pointed nipples. I just loved to feel and kiss and suck on those sweet young titties!

Soon afterwards we went to bed naked and I got my first taste of Margaret's sweet virgin pussy. I was hoping for some oral on myself in return but had to make do with a hand job, which I believe was the first one Margaret had ever given. I had to show her what to do! She definitely drew the line at me licking her pussy and her jacking me off though. She said she just wasn't ready to fuck yet and might wait until she got married for that. Anyway I could count on lots of naked petting and going down on her (which she was increasingly enjoying!) from then on, usually ending with her jacking me off which as usual was much more pleasurable than doing it myself. She still wouldn't give me any head at all though. I really missed June's lovely cocksucking skills!

This went on until the spring of 1964, actually right after school was out for the year. I met Margaret's parents and immediately sensed they didn't like me. Margaret actually told me they thought I was too old for her but she didn't care because she loved me. She still lived at home so she couldn't stay overnight with me. I tried to talk her into moving in with me but she said that wasn't the right thing to do. I pondered the situation for a while. Thoughts of marriage began to enter my mind. I really did love her and enjoyed every minute I spent with her even though I'd yet to have the ultimate thrill of fucking her. However I also valued my freedom and was hesitant to lose any of it. Marriage scared me! It still does! We'd never seriously discussed the subject up until then but I decided it was now time to do so On a Sunday afternoon while we were naked in bed I asked Margaret to marry me. She first started crying but then she said yes she would love to marry me.

That same afternoon we fucked for the first time! I thought Margaret wanted to wait until we were married but I guess this was close enough for her. She was the one that said "Let's do it!" after I had my face buried between her legs for a long while and of course I wasn't about to argue! By then I was carrying a spare condom in my wallet again so I got up to get it and rolled it over my throbbing erection. As with Vicki, my only other previous virgin, it was a bit uncomfortable for Margaret, even with lots of oral foreplay and improved oral foreplay skills on my part. Some extra lube would have helped but I hadn't discovered K-Y jelly at the time. Even with a little discomfort, Margaret seemed to enjoy the experience almost as much as I did. At least she pretended to do so! She was as happy as I had ever seen her when she went home that evening.

We knew her parents would disapprove but we both were of legal age so we drove to Lake Tahoe the next Saturday morning and got married in one of those tacky Nevada wedding chapels at the lake. She phoned her parents who were as shocked as we expected them to be and further informed them that we were staying overnight at the lake. I still remember that sex filled wedding night like it was yesterday! That wedding night was also the first time Margaret sucked my cock in foreplay and oh did that felt good! Alas there would not nearly enough of that wonderful activity in our marriage and never would I enjoy what I really loved...a full cum in mouth blow job!

We didn't get to sleep until about 5 a.m.! We came back to Fairfield Sunday afternoon and she moved right in to my apartment on Monday. Her parents were still pissed but gradually came to accept the marriage, although not completely until they became grandparents. After Margaret had all of her things moved in, we left for a two week honeymoon in Southern California (including Disneyland of course!) I don't believe I ever fucked more in any two week period in my life!

Those first couple of years of married life were absolutely great! I really enjoyed being married, for the companionship of course and also for the steady sex. I didn't have to jack off any more! Well not as often anyway! We decided that we wanted at least one child so we didn't have to use condoms anymore. I was free to fuck Margaret bareback and pump her full of cum as much as I wanted. No reason to pull right out after ejaculating either, which I always hated to do with condoms.

The only negative aspect of our sex life was that Margaret, like a lot of young women of her generation, was just not that much interested in sucking cock. Blow jobs were still something only for sluts and whores to do in most of her generation's mind I think...and they weren't too far from wrong! Margaret would once in a while give me a bit of head during foreplay but even that was rare and short. I was eating lots of pussy, becoming even more expert at it in fact and really learning to like it, but sadly not getting much head in return. I mentioned that I really liked having my dick sucked several times but her reply was always that she didn't like my penis in her mouth and that was that. I never pressed the issue but I sure missed those juicy, full cum-in-mouth blow jobs that I had from June and the whores in the service and even going back to those I received from my older woman friend Barbara when I was only 13. As I mentioned earlier Margaret never gave me even one full blow job during our four year marriage.

I thought that I would get Margaret pregnant quickly with all the fucking we were doing but it took over a year and we didn't have our baby until we had been married nearly two years. In March 1966 our daughter Jennie was born. As much as I loved the baby and the concept of being a father, those early days were rough with all the crying at night, diaper changing and just the responsibility of being a parent, not exactly the joyous experience that I had envisioned. I thought our baby would bring Margaret and I closer together but it was just the opposite. For whatever reason she just didn't have the same interest in me or sex that she had before her pregnancy. She was just "not in the mood" way too often and wouldn't even use her hand to give me sexual relief as she had in her final months of pregnancy and before that when she was having her period or just didn't feel like fucking. I found myself jacking off after she went to sleep more and more. She absolutely hated me jacking off in bed while she was awake. I will say that I never strayed once during our marriage though, even though I was tempted many times!

Things gradually went from bad to worse over the next two years. We found ourselves arguing more and more, about both major and minor things. There were also long periods of not talking much at all. The sex was now just a couple of times a week and I could tell she didn't really enjoy it all that much. It was pretty mechanical, pretty dull! Jacking off was getting to be more rewarding than fucking and I was definitely doing more of the former. There was lots of taking the new Playboy magazine into the bathroom with me and whacking off to the Playmate of the Month! The only thing we really shared together was our love for Jennie who was absolutely adorable!

In early 1968 Margaret was the one who suggested that we have a trial separation and I agreed. She moved back into her parents house with Jennie and I went back to living alone. She came over with Jennie on weekends sometimes and we had a couple more mechanical fucks but it just wasn't the same. In June of that year we agreed on a divorce. She wanted custody of Jennie and I agreed to that too, knowing she would take better care of her than I ever could. Our lawyers drew up the papers and the divorce became final in September of 1968. I felt both relieved and depressed at the same time.

Even though the visitation rights with Jennie were specified in our divorce proceedings, I have to admit I wasn't much of a father...and I truly regret that. Jennie was only 2 1/2 years old at the time of the divorce, too young to really do things with. Margaret was good about letting me see her as much as I wanted to but I just felt uneasy even going over to Margaret's parents house and facing the icy stares of Margaret's mom and dad when I picked her up. Of course in a divorce, the son in law or daughter in law is ALWAYS the villain in the spouse's parents eyes. Even seeing Margaret under these circumstances made me uncomfortable. I remembered Jennie's birthdays, showered her with gifts at Christmas but didn't have much more contact with her than that. I was hoping to do more when she got a bit older but Margaret remarried and moved to Coos Bay, Oregon when Jennie was 5. After that I hardly saw her at all. I never missed a child support payment until Jennie turned 18 and paid for a good part of her college education but our visits were few and far between. Actually in the last few years, we have become a bit closer with phone calls and e mails. She and her boyfriend have even stopped to visit a couple of times in recent years. She will be 40 in March of next year (hard to believe!) and is a nurse in Oregon. She lives with a guy but has never had kids so it doesn't look like I'll ever be a grandad which is okay I suppose, considering my record as a dad.

Margaret died of breast cancer in 2003. Even though I hadn't seen her in over 30 years, I cried after Jennie called me and gave me the sad news. I thought of that shy, sweet young girl I met in community college back in the fall of 1963 and how much I liked being with her, how much I really loved in those early years. I really thought ours was a love that was going to last forever too which I suppose shows you how naive I was back then.

Shit! This is depressing even writing about this. It's only 7 in the morning but I think I need a drink! I'll continue this saga later on.


SVN, prn said...

Enjoying your blog... you're practically a 'valley' neighbor.

Elizabeth said...


Saying goodbye is always matter how much time has passed.

Great story.