Thursday, March 30, 2006

Who Wouldn't Want to Fuck Debbie Lafave???

This story has been all over the sensation seeking cable TV networks lately. I think Nancy Grace got so outraged she was actually having orgasms on air while talking about it. Is that Nancy Grace woman weird or what? Yeah I'd still like to fuck her!

It seems that a 25 year old teacher named Debra Lafave was playing "Hide the Salami" with one of her 14 year old students. I'll bet he got an "A" on his next report card! One look at the sexy teacher and you can understand why any horny young stud would jump at the chance for that kind of extracurricular activity. Dudes all over the country are probably jacking off right now wishing it was them that became this teacher's pet! Debbie is a babe! I may even consider her for the great honor of becoming a future Jack Off Fantasy of the Month.

This kind of story always hits sort of close to home for me. As I wrote about HERE, my introduction to the wonderful world of fucking came from an older woman, a customer on my paper route. I was 15 and Barbara was in her mid thirties. There were some feelings of guilt (should I be fucking a woman old enough to my my mother?) at the time but more important and scary was the fear that my parents or friends would find out. It only lasted a few months but when it was over I truly missed Barbara and to this day I look back on the experience fondly. How can you ever forget your first fuck and first blow job? It was a great early sex education and gave me some confidence with girls later on too, just what I needed at the time. Those juicy fucks and blow jobs from Barbara were a welcome change of pace from my compulsive jacking off...just as they would be today in fact!

I suppose things like this are wrong. In this case Ms. Lafave was a teacher and we have to take that into account. Teachers shouldn't be fucking their underage students, whether they be male or female. I do however think that there is a double standard in that we sort of snicker at the thought  of older women seducing young guys but are outraged by the thought of older men seducing young gals and of course I'm talking about the seduced participants being minors in both cases, students of the seducer teachers in particular.
Can you imagine a 25 year old male teacher walking away from justice after being caught fucking one of his 14 year old female students? I don't think so! He'd be in jail right now, probably with a big black dick up his butt! And yet it does seem sort of different when the seducer is a woman. I'm sure I wasn't the first teenage boy to learn about sex in the bed of an older woman and this dude won't be the last. The big difference between then and now is that most of us guys kept it quiet in the old days. Nowadays these young dudes seem to like to fuck and tell way too often. Incidents like this get reported in the news with increasing regularity and I think sometimes lives are ruined that really shouldn't be.

My advice for older guys and gals, especially those in positions of authority, would be just to keep your desire for young stuff in the fantasy stage. It's not worth having your personal life or career ruined or spending jail or time over some hot young pussy or hot young cock. Nothing wrong with fantasy and masturbation if you do get attracted to some jail bait of either sex though. Let's face it, both males and females are pretty damn attractive (and sexy!) in their mid to late teens but it's better for all concerned to resist temptation just look and not touch unless you want to end up in jail listening to Nancy Grace rave and rant about you on TV

To you young studs who do happen to be playing "Hide the Salami" with a sexy older gal (you lucky bastards!)...Yo dude! Just keep your fucking mouth shut, enjoy that pussy and those blow jobs and keep a good thing going! It will all be over before you know it! You know what I'm sayin' homie? Now if you will all excuse me, I need to go jack Debbie Lafave! Hubba Hubba! What a babe!

Monday, March 27, 2006

Nice Try Dude!

The above cartoon made me chuckle...besides I couldn't think of anything to write about today! You can only do so many posts about your current sex life when it's exclusively limited to jacking off (not that I don't enjoy that wonderful activity!) I sure wish I could find someone to kiss my "nose"! Of course what I really need down there between my legs is more than just a kiss. A nice, juicy cum in mouth blow job would be mighty fine right about now...or any other time!

As I've mentioned here several times before a full blow job is probably as close to heaven as I'll ever come here on Planet Earth. Since I'm unfortunately missing one of the two key ingredients for a blow job (a warm, willing female mouth) I guess I'll just have to take things in hand while I fantasize about that lovely experience that I miss so very much...being sucked off! Thanks for reading you nice people! Hopefully I'll actually have something a bit less whiny to babble about in my next post. Bye bye for now!

Friday, March 24, 2006

More Nostalgia From the Innocent 1950's: Those Adult Movies

I've written before about how puritanical the 1950's were and how hard it was for us horny teenage boys to find visual inspiration for our favorite pastime of jacking off. Not that we really needed THAT much inspiration you understand! Just thinking about the cute girl down the street you would like to stick your big weenie in was enough to make you head for the bathroom or go in your bedroom for a quickie jerk off session. Even touching your dick when you took a pee was enough to inspire you to give the ol' wiener some more exercise. In reality we probably jacked off just about as much as today's horny teen boys, maybe even a bit more since we didn't have all the other high tech diversions modern teens have. All we really had to play with was our dicks!

Of course jacking off (then and now!) is usually more pleasurable with some nice visual inspiration. These young dudes of today with their internet, porno DVDs and cable TV really don't know how good they have it. Don't forget those sweetie pie girlfriends who are apparently quite generous with their blow jobs!. Like I've said before, I was just born 50 fucking years too soon! All we had in the 1950's (if we were lucky!) was a picture of a topless African or South Seas maiden from National Geographic or maybe a picture of a nude photo model we tore out of U.S. Camera magazine at the library. That's if some other horny dude didn't see it and rip it out first!

The mainstream movies that played at our neighborhood theaters didn't offer us much jerk off inspiration either. The Production Code kept a tight reign on Hollywood in those days. Even tits and ass shots were strictly taboo in Hollywood films. Any profanity beyond "damn" or "hell" (and little of that!) was not allowed. Sex was either not mentioned at all or only hinted at. Of course there were Marilyn Monroe, Jayne Mansfield, Anita Ekberg and Kim Novak (left) to give us boners with their lovely bodies and low cut dresses...but oh how we would have loved to see them nude! Just cleavage in a movie was enough to give me many a boner though and more than once I jacked off in the back row of the stadium balcony of the Uptown Theater in Napa while I fantasized that I was fucking one of those babes up there on the big screen.

Outside of Hollywood films there were the movies for adults only. Of course as teenagers we were not allowed to get in the adult theaters to see them. Most of these adult theaters were in the big cities anyway. There certainly weren't any in Napa where I spent my teenage years. Later, when I came of age, I was to discover that those films were also extremely tame..and lame! Only tits and ass were shown and sometimes you didn't even get that! The women in the burlesque films usually wore pasties and G strings. Shots of pubic hair, genitals and explicit sex were as taboo there as they were in the Hollywood films. In retrospect I didn't miss too much by not being allowed to see those damn things as a teen!

A few adult films did make it to the smaller cities and towns as special engagements for adult audiences only. "Mom and Dad" was one of the most notorious. The rumor among us teenagers was that it showed actual fucking! That of course was not the case. It apparently was sort of a dramatized warning about the dangers of sex which concluded with actual footage of the birth of a baby. That shows you just how desperate producers had to get to even show a little bare skin in those days. As I recall they even segregated the audiences for "Mom and Dad", men and women at separate showings! Apparently a "sex expert" named "Elliot Forbes" traveled with the film and an intermission was built into the film for a short lecture and the hawking of a $1.00 sex manual. I never did see "Mom and Dad" and I don't think I missed much...but it was a legend in it's time, especially among those of us too young to see it!

These posters above for "Mom and Dad" seem to indicate that high school age youth were able to see the movie. I am pretty sure it played Napa for adults only...or all of us horny young dudes would have been there with throbbing dicks! It's been a while though and maybe I missed a good chance to get some sex education and additional jack off inspiration early on. Come to think of it fat chance my mom and dad would have permitted me to see that if even if I would have been permitted to attend. I'm also not even sure I was a teenager when "Mom & Dad" played Napa. In any case I've never seen it to this day but have heard it's a real snoozer with very little weenie stiffening material, about as sexy as a seventeenth re-run of "I Love Lucy"
...not that I didn't jack off to "I Love Lucy" when I really got desperate and the family was out of the house! Like I said we took our jack off inspiration where we could find it in those days!

The one time I did manage to see a couple of these so called "adult" films was in my mid-teens. Me and my buddy hitchhiked down to Vallejo where  drive in theater was showing a double feature of "Garden of Eden" and "One Summer of Happiness". We snuck in the exit gate of the drive in and sat on the ground by a speaker stand in the far corner of the back row and watched both flicks, keeping a close eye out for the manager who sometimes roamed the lot looking for gate crashers like us, rowdy teenagers or those humping in the back seat of their cars. I imagine there was a little extra back seat humping with programs like this up there on the big screen! Fortunately we made it all the way through the double feature without being caught.

"Garden of Eden" was supposedly the "Gone With the Wind" of nudist movies, mainly because it was shot in "glorious" color. Apparently most of the previous nudist flicks (which went way back to the 1930's) were in black and white. This one was shot in a nudist camp in Florida and did feature a beautiful and statuesque young actress who gave me a throbbing hard on the minute she started taking off her clothes. Like all of the nudist movies of the era, all you got to see were tits and ass though. No "beavers or pickles" as I was later to find out that pussies and cocks were known as in the adult film business.

The cameraman had to be very careful in composing his shots and all unwanted shots of pubic hair and genitals were edited out. The Production Code did not apply to adult films of course but state and local governments would not permit any depictions of full frontal nudity or actual sex. It would be pointless to even produce such a film that included such scenes. It would be raided in the first city it played in and the producers would have been arrested. That's just how restrictive our policies were about nudity and sex in movies back then...and yeah it really sucked!

Note in this still photo poster for "Garden of Eden" that most of the nudists are wearing clothes! (Bummer!) Also note that the one topless woman previously had a tape pasted over her breasts by a theater manager so no innocent parties walking by the theater would be offended by the sight of a bare titty. Ah yes those were puritanical times folks!

"One Summer of Happiness" was a black and white Swedish film and very popular in it's time, again playing strictly to adult audiences but it did make it far beyond the adult and "art" theaters in the big cities. It's claim to fame was a nude bathing scene between a young Swedish couple. The gal was a babe and those tits were lovely...but that's about all you saw in the whole damn movie. The rest of the film was pretty dull. We sat through the whole thing, hoping for some more titty shots or real sex but it never happened. We hitchhiked home and I immediately went in my room and jacked off. I had a hard on for the better part of the next month thinking of  that bare skin I had seen on that big drive in screen. Yeah it was only tits and ass but it was the first time I'd seen that up there on the big screen and that revelation gave me lots of inspiration to beat my meat.

Me and my buddy made one more trip to that drive in theater a couple of years later to attempt to sneak in and see French "sex kitten" Brigette Bardot in "And God Created Woman" but this time the manager did catch us in the middle of the movie and called our parents who were not amused and came to pick us up. Damn the bad luck! We did manage to see enough of the movie to get a glimpse of a semi-nude Brigette Bardot and that was enough to give me a hard on for a week and much jack off inspiration for the next six months so the evening wasn't a total loss. That was unfortunately the end of my adult movie experiences as a horny teenager and that's enough nostalgia for today! Thanks for reading!

Sunday, March 19, 2006

My Fifties (Part 3) Slim Pickings for the Rest of the Decade

After Pat left me in 1997 I went into my usual blue funk over another failed relationship. This funk was the worst one since my first marriage broke up when Margaret left me, taking our young daughter with her. I truly loved both of those women. For the umpteenth time in my life I turned to masturbation, and lots of it, to get me through the nights...and days and weeks and months and years! Pat was the last serious relationship I've had up until this day. Since that was 1997 and this is 2006 you know I have been doing some serious jacking off in the last decade my friends! I'm not complaining or looking for sympathy though. I'd certainly rather be in a good relationship and am continuing to look for another one but I also enjoy my single, independent lifestyle and I think you know by now that I love to jack things could be worse...and they will probably get so when I REALLY get old! Does anybody know if jacking off is allowed in nursing homes? Hopefully it will never come to that! For now I'm pretty much a happy camper...or happy jerker!

I only had one more sexual experience with a woman in my fifties, and that was one I'd just as soon forget. I went to Waikiki Beach in Honolulu, Hawaii in the fall of 1988 and met a forty something Jewish woman from Pittsburgh, PA named Louise in my hotel restaurant. I saw her sitting by herself at breakfast for the first couple of days I was there. Since women by themselves are fairly rare at Waikiki (women seem to be usually with boyfriends, hubbies or girlfriends) I asked to join her at her table on the third day. Louise was friendly, had a nice sense of humor, indeed on vacation by herself so we decided to do some things together, starting by renting a car and taking a drive around Oahu island.

We ended up spending the next three or four days mostly together. Louise was hardly a babe, quite a bit overweight and fairly plain but she was fun to be with, a good companion for lunch and dinner (mostly with separate checks) and doing the tourist things with. We took long walks in the evening and talked of lots of different things. I think she said she'd never been married but had some ex boyfriends...but I'm not even sure of that. I doubt there had been much romance in her life, although I could be wrong. There wasn't much sexual chemistry between the two of us and I really didn't intend to try to get in her panties during our brief time together. It was sort of a brother-sister relationship. By ten or eleven o'clock we were back in our own hotel rooms by ourselves...except for that last night!

On the night before the day Louise flew home, we went out for some Mai-tais and other tropical drinks at some of the local night spots. We got a little drunk (to say the least!) I don't know what was in those Mai-tais but I got one throbbing hard on while we were still in the last bar! If it happened today, I would suspect somebody spiked my drink with a half dozen Viagra tablets! Louise started to look MUCH better to me and I had a sudden desire to bury my throbbing cock inside her! So much for the brother-sister thing!

I vaguely remember taking Louise back to my hotel room that night. She was so looped she thought that it was her room at first. I guess all hotel rooms look alike, especially when you are that fucked up! I told her she was in no shape to try to find her own room and she should stay with me for the night. I promised her that I would be a "good boy" (uh huh!) and she finally decided it was the best thing to do. We both could hardly stand up by this point!
We laid down on the bed and started making out. Louise seemed to be as ready and willing to engage in that as I was. Lots of passionate kissing and I soon had my hands on her big breasts (through her clothes) with no objection from her. One piece of clothing at a time came off and we were soon both completely nude on the bed. I can't say that Louise's body was the things wet dreams are made of but I still had a raging hard on that I wanted to get between her legs...or maybe better yet in her mouth!

As I felt Louise's tits and sucked her nipples I put my hand down between her legs and soon found she didn't have much lubrication there at all. I figured some expert pussy eating would take care of that so I soon had my face buried between her fat thighs. She seemed to enjoy that and soon became much more aroused as I continued to do my professional "yodeling in the canyon" act. After awhile, when my jaw started getting tired I moved back up so we could be face to face. I was hoping she would return the oral favor with some cocksucking but so far she hadn't even put her hand on my cock and that continued to be the case. I went back to pussy eating for a while!

I finally asked her if she wanted to fuck and she said we better not because she might become pregnant. I told her I had some condoms and she said okay but the tone of her voice told me she was not enthusiastic at all. I went into the bathroom and put on a rubber and rubbed some K-Y Jelly all over my throbbing cock. I still had "the mother of all hard ons"! I went back and tried to slip it into Louise but there was just "no way Jose!" I could get it in. It would have been easier attempting to stick a wet noodle up a wildcat's ass1 I never had that problem in my life until that night. I'm not sure if Louise was just tense or nervous or if she was in fact a 40+ year old virgin. She was still fairly wet, her clit became erect when I massaged it but no way I could get my dick in her. We would reach a point and she would say "Stop! It hurts!" and I would of course do as she said.

Finally I just gave up on trying to get my cock into Louise and took the condom off. I asked Louise if she would suck me off. I could tell by the look on her face she was not enthusiastic about that either. She sucked me (not very well!) for about 30 seconds and she stopped and told me she didn't like to do that. I then asked for a hand job and she started yanking on my boner, again not doing it very well but at least it felt better than doing it myself. I was starting to enjoy the manual stimulation when she stopped and laid down on her stomach on her side of the bed. She said she didn't want to do that either. SHIT! At that point I just gave up trying to get any sexual relief from her. I grabbed my throbbing boner and started jacking myself off. It didn't take long until I felt a powerful ejaculation approaching. I don't know what made me do it (blame it on the booze!) but aimed my dick at Louise's big fat buns and blasted a heavy load all over her butt and lower back. SPURT! SPURT! SPURT! It seemed like the mother of all ejaculations! There was fucking jism everywhere!!!

Louise was not amused and I can't say that I blame her. I can still hear her yelling with that New York accent "You bastard! You didn't have to cum all over me!" Even though she should have taken care of me, at least with her hand after all the time I had spent with my mouth and tongue between her legs, this was a rather rude thing to do, not characteristic of me at all. Blame it on those Mai- Tais or maybe that old saying "a stiff dick has no conscience!" I apologized but Louise was still highly pissed. She got up, went into the bathroom to clean off the cum and came back and put on her clothes without even saying a word to me. She did manage to gave me the finger right before she slammed the door on the way out. Her flight home was early next morning and I was glad I didn't have to face her anymore on that day...or ever again! I was too hungover to even get out of bed until late afternoon.

My whole point to this story is that sometimes sex in real life just isn't like it is in the movies. Sometimes it's lame, sometimes it's lousy and sometimes it just truly sucks (no pun intended!). I actually found that out when I was doing frequent one night stands way back in my thirties, but this was one of my more ridiculous sexual encounters and a pathetic way to end those sexual encounters of my fifties.

Sometimes you wish you'd just stayed home and jacked off instead of making a fool out of yourself in your quest for pussy! As for jacking off there was plenty more of that activity ahead for me too! We'll get to the final part of my sexual saga, bringing you up to the present, soon! Meanwhile thanks for reading...and to Louise wherever you are, sorry for my rude behavior in that Hawaiian hotel room! Aloha y'all!

Thursday, March 16, 2006

My Fifties (Part 2) My Longest Lasting Relationship

Pat was my dentist's receptionist and assistant, a lovely redheaded Irish gal in her early forties. I'd been attracted to her for several years but since I was in a relationship with Gloria most of that time she was nothing more than a nice gal and sometimes sexual fantasy as I sat in that damn dentist's chair having my teeth cleaned. For some reason I sort of thought she was married, even though she didn't wear a wedding ring. She just seemed the married type. After Gloria left me Pat started appearing in my jack off fantasies even went I wasn't at the dentist's office and I ALMOST started looking forward going to the dentist just so I could talk to Pat. She was always cheerful, always friendly, just seemed like a nice person...and besides that she was a babe and I've always had a thing for redheads as well as women who work in the medical field.

One morning in mid 1993 I got through with my twice yearly dental checkup and cleaning just before noon and Pat and the rest of the staff were about to take their lunch break. Pat had her lunch in a bag on her desk but I asked her if I could take her out to lunch anyway. She said that was an offer too good to pass up and that was the beginning of our relationship. It turns out that Pat had been divorced for almost 10 years and not currently in a relationship. She later admitted she had been attracted to me for quite a while too and looked forward to seeing me in the office. We quickly became a couple...and I quickly found myself in love once again!

We went to bed for the first time after our first dinner date. It didn't take much coaxing. After her long "dry spell" Pat was ready and willing to jump right in the sack and I'm happy to say we agreed from the beginning to practice safe sex! She'd had a couple of boyfriends since her divorce but apparently nothing too serious and no boyfriend and no sex in quite a while. Pat kept good care of herself with diet and exercise and had an absolutely lovely body. Her tits were still quite firm, she had a shapely butt and legs and as always that red pubic hair drove me wild! Every time I looked at it, I wanted to (and usually did) bury my face in that lovely red haired muff!
Pat loved having her pussy licked  and returned the favor with lots of nice oral on me, including some sweet cum in the mouth blow jobs. We both soon got STD tests and Pat put herself on the pill so we could dispense of those damn rubbers. Aside from the great sex Pat was just a very nice person, quite a change from the sometimes explosive Gloria. She was also a non smoker so all that stale smoke in my apartment was a thing of the past. I thought I'd met my life long partner at last!

About three months after we met, we moved in together. I bought a nice new condo in the suburbs of Stockton, where I still live today. Life just got better and better with Pat. The more I got to know her the more I liked her. I got along with Pat's parents and the rest of her large family fine. Gloria's parents who were Italian hated my guts and my two ex-wives' parents didn't much care for me either. I was beginning to wonder if I really was the asshole some people thought I was! Pat and I had a lot in common and agreed on most everything from politics to movies and music. We went out often for dinner, movies and concerts and took weekend trips to San Francisco, Lake Tahoe, Monterey and other parts of Northern California. Our vacations took us to Hawaii, Europe, Australia and New Zealand among other places. Life was good and I was more content than I had been in a long, long time!

We talked about marriage sometimes even though I had vowed after my second divorce I would never marry again. I thought if for no other reason, getting married would at least get Pat my quite good civil service medical benefits. She was in good health though and satisfied with the medical benefits her dentist employer was providing and didn't think that was a major concern. She also seemed lukewarm about the whole idea of marriage, maybe because of her first disaster. Like I said, we talked about it but always put it on the back burner...and just never got married. I guess we were both just sort of satisfied with the status quo.

The first three years or so with Pat were absolutely wonderful. I'm still not sure what happened after that but things started to go downhill very slowly after that. I truly don't think I did anything wrong. I certainly never cheated on her. Even though I'm a horndog, I've in fact never cheated while in any serious relationship including my two marriages. That's one thing that I'm really proud of! I also have no reason to believe there was another guy involved, even though for a while I suspected she might have a thing for that dentist she worked for. I don't know...I really don't know what happened but our relationship started to grow stale at roughly the three year point. We seemed to have less to say to each other, the dinners and weekend trips became less and less and even the sex became less frequent. There hadn't been much need to jack off in the first three years but I was back to doing that now between our infrequent fucking sessions. Actually we were still fucking a couple times a week...but that was not enough for me at the time. Pat didn't appreciate me jacking off in bed beside her either (guess it was her Catholic upbringing!) so it was back to discrete whacking off in the bathroom just like when I was a horny teenager.

We stayed together for another year or so and things continued to slide downhill. Still no big arguments or fights, just more indifference than anything else. Every time I asked her what was wrong she would just say something like "Oh nothing!" I don't know if it was depression or if it was something I did...or maybe our relationship had just gone stale like so many others that start out great...sort of like that of Woody Allen and Diane Keaton in the movie "Annie Hall". Whatever the reason, things just weren't what they once were!

Pat's dad, a great guy who she was devoted to, had a heart attack and died in the early fall of 1997. That really bummed her out! Her mom was having a hard time dealing with it and Pat decided she would go live with her for a while. She said she would be back as much as possible and for a while she did come back a couple of times a week and would usually would spend the night with me but that eventually stopped and she finally broke the news to me she wanted to move out for good. By then this news wasn't totally unexpected and since I was getting pretty worn out by her sour moods and lack of interest in our relationship I reluctantly agreed that it was the best thing to do. I told her that I still loved her and she could come back anytime she wanted to. Pat moved out the weekend after Thanksgiving of 1997. It seems that a lot of my relationships have broken up right around the holidays which never helps my disposition at the that time of year...and it didn't this time either!

I only saw Pat a couple more times after that. I stopped going to the dentist she worked for because it was just too painful to see her under those circumstances anymore. I ran into her brother at a Home Depot about three years ago and asked about her. He said she's now living in Merced and doing well. I didn't ask about her personal life, whether she's married or in a relationship. I really would rather not know. I just told him to give her my best regards. He said the family could never understand what happened between us and I told I really didn't understand it either.

I have no regrets at all over this relationship with Pat, so far at four and one half years, the longest of my life. The first three years or so were probably the happiest years of my life. I wish things had turned out differently but they just didn't. Pat is another person who I worry about stumbling on this blog someday. She would not be amused to find herself here, nor would her family...but there just was no way to leave her out! She was too important to me. Pat, along with my first girlfriend VIcki and my first wife Margaret were the three great loves in my life! Pat if you ever read these words...I'm sorry!

Monday, March 13, 2006

My Fifties (Part 1) The Hitchhiker and the Whore

Gloria, my next door neighbor and girlfriend moved out in March of 1990 after one argument too many between us. After almost three years I missed her  for both the companionship and the sex of course but the post breakup trauma wasn't nearly as bad as it was with my two divorces nor when some other important relationships broke up. I guess Gloria's big mouth and hot temper had a lot to do with it but the peace and quiet after she left actually seemed very welcome for a change. We didn't really love each other anyway, we were only friends and fuck buddies! Gloria was also a heavy smoker and I don't smoke at all. It was nice not to have to smell all that damn stale smoke in the apartment all the time.

With the help of a bunch of new porno videos that I immediately went out and purchased I went back to regular jacking off for sexual release. By then the porno movie theaters had pretty much shut down, made obsolete by Betamax and VHS video recorders and readily available XXX ratedvideos. There were no more porn flicks on the big screen and jacking off at the old Pussycat Theater was now a thing of the past, something I sort of missed at the time, something truthfully that I still miss. It was of course by then much more convenient and hassle free to watch porn and jack off in the comfort of your living room...and believe me I was regularly doing just that!  I jacked off so much to "Debbie Does Dallas" I wore out my Betamax copy and had to go out and buy another. That was one hot porn flick amigo!

I turned 50 in August of 1990. I'm not sure why but that birthday didn't bother me nearly as much as turning 40 did. I was pretty content even though I didn't have a female companion and steady sex partner in my life. The job was going well, I was doing a lot of traveling and had a comfortable amount of money to spend as I chose. Of course I was still a horndog! I ogled all the young women, fantasized about fucking them as I walked down the street and jacked off to them later but I really wasn't going to the bars or hunting poontang much at all anymore. I figured sooner or later I'd meet another companion and for now jerking off was all I needed to get me through the night. Maybe it was just a sign of getting older and getting wiser.

I confess that I wasn't completely a wise man though. I mentioned in an earlier post that the AIDS epidemic had pretty much scared me straight in regard to one night stands, whores and fucking without condoms. My first two sexual encounters in my fifties were indeed quickies without condoms. They were spur of the moment things that just happened. I lucked out and never caught anything but worrying about them afterwards taught me a lesson...don't do that again! What can I tell you except that my daddy's favorite old saying "A stiff prick has no conscience!" consisted of the truest words ever spoken! I think BIll Clinton among many other guys will confirm that!

I think it was the week before Easter in 1991. I was driving back to Stockton from San Diego when I picked up a young female hitchhiker named Joyce. I stopped for gas in LA and Joyce was waiting by the freeway entrance with thumb out as I got back onto Interstate 5. I never stop for guy hitchhikers but gals are a different story, not that I ever expect sex to be the result of picking them up. Women are just more fun to talk to and in general you don't have to worry about losing your wallet or being whacked over the head by them. Joyce appeared to be sort of a "hippie chick" even though the days of the hippies were long gone. Long brown hair, no bra, well worn jeans, her belongings in a backpack. She was a UCLA college student going to spend the spring break with her sister who lived near San Francisco. She was friendly and we talked about lots of different things as we headed north.

I hadn't been around too many women her age (she turned out to be 19) and I was a bit surprised by her vocabulary. Lots of profanities including liberal use of "fuck". I asked her if she had a boyfriend and she said she had one but dumped him "because all he wanted to do is fuck", among other choice comments. I just laughed and said her boyfriend sounded completely normal to me! I asked her if she wanted to stop for lunch in Bakersfield and she said she didn't have much money so of course I offered to buy lunch for her and she gladly accepted my offer. We talked more as we headed north after lunch but she soon fell asleep in the passenger side. I glanced over at the cleavage, the bouncing boobies and the crotch of her tight jeans as she slept and wished I was thirty years younger! I could feel my cock getting hard as I continued to drive north.

Joyce woke up a couple of hours later as we approached Stockton. It was late afternoon and would be dark in an hour or so. I really expected her to decline my invitation but I told Joyce she was welcome to spend the night on the couch in my living room and continue to her Bay Area destination in the morning. She did reply "No thanks" and said she wanted to finish the trip that night. I said that was fine but just be careful hitchhiking at night. A few minutes later she changed her mind and took me up on my offer to spend the night. She said she would call her sister and tell her she was in a motel for the night. I told her that was really the best thing to do. We stopped at a restaurant and I bought her dinner before driving us to my apartment.

I REALLY didn't expect to have sex that night. I didn't think there was a chance in hell that a 19 year old girl would want to fuck a 50 year old guy! That's just ti what happened though. We drank some wine and she offered me some pot from her backpack, the first I had smoked in about 20 years. Not being a smoker, pot had really never appealed to me that much. Of course I tried it in the sixties (who didn't?) but never really got the habit. This was some good shit though and I think it just loosened both of us enough to want to fuck. We were soon making out like a couple of teens (actually she still was a teen!) She was the one who said "Take me to bed!" I remember her giggling as I picked her up and carried into my bedroom. Before long we were both naked and I had my head buried between her shapely young legs. She returned the favor with some lovely pre-fucking cock sucking! A wet dream come to life!

The sex was absolutely great! I hadn't been with a girl her age since I was in my twenties, haven't been with one since either and at my age I'm reasonably sure that I never will be with one again. I suspect it was my "last hurrah" with tight young still teen pussy! I'd been with women closer to my own age ever since Barbara (my older woman friend) introduced me to sex. No complaints there at all, women my age or even a bit older are fine and I love them all! But it was a rush fucking a lovely 19 year old with her almost perfect body...those firm tits, that soft, round butt and that tight, tight young pussy...I'm getting hard just thinking about that night! After fucking we talked, drank some more wine and then fucked again. We didn't get to sleep until about 3 or 4 in the morning.

I awoke with a bad hangover about 10 the next morning. Joyce was still sleeping beside me. It then hit me that we had fucked twice without condoms and I thought "Oh shit!", not only thinking about STDs but also about the other possibility that I knocked her up. I woke Joyce up and told her what time it was. She was not feeling too good herself. I got up, made some coffee and breakfast for us. The coffee and hot showers which we then took separately seemed to help. When she came out of the shower and I gazed on that lovely young body I felt like fucking her again or at least burying my face in that sweet young freshly showered muff. I tried to talk her into fucking (with a condom this time...a blow job or a hand job would do!) but she said she had to get going, her sister would be worrying about her.

 I called Greyhound Bus and found there was an early afternoon bus to San Francisco and told her I would buy her a ticket and it would be better than hitching. She said okay so I drove her to the bus depot in Stockton and we said goodbye. I never saw or heard from Joyce again, not that I expected to. I worried for a while about knocking her up and having a paternity suit slapped on me but that never happened. I doubt that I had to worry about STDs in her case...but it was still stupid to fuck without a condom. Blame it on the wine...or the pot...or just that old phrase "A stiff dick has no conscience!" Oh how sweet that warm young body was though...a night I will truly never forget!

If that wasn't enough unsafe sex, a few months later I got approached by a young woman in downtown Stockton. She didn't look like a professional whore but she needed some money and after I turned her panhandling request down offered me a blow job for $20. She was cute, I was horny and even though I knew I shouldn't have, I took her up on her offer and let her suck me off in my car. She didn't have any condoms, insisted she was clean but looking back, what a stupid fucking move on my part! I worried about that blow job for months afterwards! I had made my "no more whoring" vow years earlier but had slipped off the wagon again! As with Joyce, I lucked out once again. I went for an AIDS test several months later, then again at the one year mark and both proved negative.

That little episode and the worry afterward definitely taught me a lesson though. No more whores EVER and no more fucking without condoms unless you are absolutely sure you are both clean (in a permanent relationship in other words!) And yet...proving some of us never learn I fucked Gloria (my old girlfriend) without a condom when she paid me an unexpected visit last fall. We talked about it, both said we hadn't been having any casual relationships and were clean, I trust her completely...and yet...and yet...will I ever learn my lesson? Maybe it's true that you really can't teach an old (horn)dog new tricks!

Anyway, after the one night stand with Joyce and the blow job from the whore, it was back to safe sex, which meant jacking off and porn for the next couple of years until I met my next true love...and I'll write about that in my next installment. Hey, aren't you glad this boring (but true!) story of my sex life will soon be coming to an end? I'll be up to the present day by next month. Then what the fuck am I going to write about, besides the quite obvious jacking off? I haven't got a clue!