Thursday, March 16, 2006

My Fifties (Part 2) My Longest Lasting Relationship

Pat was my dentist's receptionist and assistant, a lovely redheaded Irish gal in her early forties. I'd been attracted to her for several years but since I was in a relationship with Gloria most of that time she was nothing more than a nice gal and sometimes sexual fantasy as I sat in that damn dentist's chair having my teeth cleaned. For some reason I sort of thought she was married, even though she didn't wear a wedding ring. She just seemed the married type. After Gloria left me Pat started appearing in my jack off fantasies even went I wasn't at the dentist's office and I ALMOST started looking forward going to the dentist just so I could talk to Pat. She was always cheerful, always friendly, just seemed like a nice person...and besides that she was a babe and I've always had a thing for redheads as well as women who work in the medical field.

One morning in mid 1993 I got through with my twice yearly dental checkup and cleaning just before noon and Pat and the rest of the staff were about to take their lunch break. Pat had her lunch in a bag on her desk but I asked her if I could take her out to lunch anyway. She said that was an offer too good to pass up and that was the beginning of our relationship. It turns out that Pat had been divorced for almost 10 years and not currently in a relationship. She later admitted she had been attracted to me for quite a while too and looked forward to seeing me in the office. We quickly became a couple...and I quickly found myself in love once again!

We went to bed for the first time after our first dinner date. It didn't take much coaxing. After her long "dry spell" Pat was ready and willing to jump right in the sack and I'm happy to say we agreed from the beginning to practice safe sex! She'd had a couple of boyfriends since her divorce but apparently nothing too serious and no boyfriend and no sex in quite a while. Pat kept good care of herself with diet and exercise and had an absolutely lovely body. Her tits were still quite firm, she had a shapely butt and legs and as always that red pubic hair drove me wild! Every time I looked at it, I wanted to (and usually did) bury my face in that lovely red haired muff!
Pat loved having her pussy licked  and returned the favor with lots of nice oral on me, including some sweet cum in the mouth blow jobs. We both soon got STD tests and Pat put herself on the pill so we could dispense of those damn rubbers. Aside from the great sex Pat was just a very nice person, quite a change from the sometimes explosive Gloria. She was also a non smoker so all that stale smoke in my apartment was a thing of the past. I thought I'd met my life long partner at last!

About three months after we met, we moved in together. I bought a nice new condo in the suburbs of Stockton, where I still live today. Life just got better and better with Pat. The more I got to know her the more I liked her. I got along with Pat's parents and the rest of her large family fine. Gloria's parents who were Italian hated my guts and my two ex-wives' parents didn't much care for me either. I was beginning to wonder if I really was the asshole some people thought I was! Pat and I had a lot in common and agreed on most everything from politics to movies and music. We went out often for dinner, movies and concerts and took weekend trips to San Francisco, Lake Tahoe, Monterey and other parts of Northern California. Our vacations took us to Hawaii, Europe, Australia and New Zealand among other places. Life was good and I was more content than I had been in a long, long time!

We talked about marriage sometimes even though I had vowed after my second divorce I would never marry again. I thought if for no other reason, getting married would at least get Pat my quite good civil service medical benefits. She was in good health though and satisfied with the medical benefits her dentist employer was providing and didn't think that was a major concern. She also seemed lukewarm about the whole idea of marriage, maybe because of her first disaster. Like I said, we talked about it but always put it on the back burner...and just never got married. I guess we were both just sort of satisfied with the status quo.

The first three years or so with Pat were absolutely wonderful. I'm still not sure what happened after that but things started to go downhill very slowly after that. I truly don't think I did anything wrong. I certainly never cheated on her. Even though I'm a horndog, I've in fact never cheated while in any serious relationship including my two marriages. That's one thing that I'm really proud of! I also have no reason to believe there was another guy involved, even though for a while I suspected she might have a thing for that dentist she worked for. I don't know...I really don't know what happened but our relationship started to grow stale at roughly the three year point. We seemed to have less to say to each other, the dinners and weekend trips became less and less and even the sex became less frequent. There hadn't been much need to jack off in the first three years but I was back to doing that now between our infrequent fucking sessions. Actually we were still fucking a couple times a week...but that was not enough for me at the time. Pat didn't appreciate me jacking off in bed beside her either (guess it was her Catholic upbringing!) so it was back to discrete whacking off in the bathroom just like when I was a horny teenager.

We stayed together for another year or so and things continued to slide downhill. Still no big arguments or fights, just more indifference than anything else. Every time I asked her what was wrong she would just say something like "Oh nothing!" I don't know if it was depression or if it was something I did...or maybe our relationship had just gone stale like so many others that start out great...sort of like that of Woody Allen and Diane Keaton in the movie "Annie Hall". Whatever the reason, things just weren't what they once were!

Pat's dad, a great guy who she was devoted to, had a heart attack and died in the early fall of 1997. That really bummed her out! Her mom was having a hard time dealing with it and Pat decided she would go live with her for a while. She said she would be back as much as possible and for a while she did come back a couple of times a week and would usually would spend the night with me but that eventually stopped and she finally broke the news to me she wanted to move out for good. By then this news wasn't totally unexpected and since I was getting pretty worn out by her sour moods and lack of interest in our relationship I reluctantly agreed that it was the best thing to do. I told her that I still loved her and she could come back anytime she wanted to. Pat moved out the weekend after Thanksgiving of 1997. It seems that a lot of my relationships have broken up right around the holidays which never helps my disposition at the that time of year...and it didn't this time either!

I only saw Pat a couple more times after that. I stopped going to the dentist she worked for because it was just too painful to see her under those circumstances anymore. I ran into her brother at a Home Depot about three years ago and asked about her. He said she's now living in Merced and doing well. I didn't ask about her personal life, whether she's married or in a relationship. I really would rather not know. I just told him to give her my best regards. He said the family could never understand what happened between us and I told I really didn't understand it either.

I have no regrets at all over this relationship with Pat, so far at four and one half years, the longest of my life. The first three years or so were probably the happiest years of my life. I wish things had turned out differently but they just didn't. Pat is another person who I worry about stumbling on this blog someday. She would not be amused to find herself here, nor would her family...but there just was no way to leave her out! She was too important to me. Pat, along with my first girlfriend VIcki and my first wife Margaret were the three great loves in my life! Pat if you ever read these words...I'm sorry!


Anastasia Beaverhousen said...

Why would anybody be angry at you for finding them selves in this blog? It's a wonderful life and they are part of it plus you really say mostly nice things about all your partners.

Elizabeth said...

People love to read blogs, love the stories about life, love, sex....unless it's about them! Sigh.

I had a beautiful relationship end without any explanation, other than, "I guess this is just another of life's mysteries." It took me a full year to get over that, to figure out how to accept that life, and relationships, have aspects that can never be explained.

Horny Old Guy said...

Anastasia I don't think most people would like to find themselves mentioned in a raunchy blog like this, with details (good and bad) of their/our sex life mentioned. Come to think of it, it wouldn't bother me...but then again I'm a dirty old man! I do think it's unlikely my past lovers will stumble on this site though and I don't think I've ever mentioned a last I think I'm okay...for now! If anybody does object, I'll take them out immediately.

Elizabeth you are so right about relationships that end in unexplainable ways, although I think they are in a minority. This is the only one of mine that I haven't had a fairly good idea of what caused the breakup. Any two people seldom love each other with absolutely equal passion and devotion though. It would be nice if that was the case but it's not...and sometimes the other person's lesser degree of love fades even more when you don't want it too. That's life (or at least has been my life!) After reading your blog and looking at your pic, any man who leaves you is nuts anyway...and in the long run you probably didn't lose that much...although I realize you may see that differently!