Monday, July 31, 2006

I Survived the Knife!

The good news is the vasectomy on Friday was no big deal. The bad news is no jacking off or fucking for a week. Well that sucks! I was in and out of the doc's office in less than an hour. The little operation itself only took about 10 minutes and except for that quick anesthetic shot in the nutsack was completely painless. Even in my state of terror I still found myself having nasty fantasies about the doctor's cute nurse who was assisting. No chance of springing a boner under those conditions though. My weenie had shrunk down to about as small as it ever gets...I think it was scared too and was trying to hide!

A bit of discomfort over the weekend but again no big deal. Pain pills pretty much took care of that. No showers for 48 hours (which was up yesterday) and tonight I can resume hot baths which should feel pretty good. It feels fine "down there" now but the doctor told me no sexual activity until at least Friday which will be one week after the operation. He suggested that I just masturbate at first to see how it feels but stop and wait a few more days if there is any discomfort. If the discomfort continues, get back to him. Otherwise I don't see him for four weeks when I go in to jack off in a bottle so he can do the first semen check to see if all the sperm thingies are gone. Hey that jacking off in a bottle sounds like fun anyway...wonder if his sexy nurse will assist me there (I wish!!!).

Marcella volunteered to come over on the weekend but since I wasn't able to take showers and wasn't feeling all that great I told her it was best I spend the weekend by myself. Besides she always makes me horny when she comes over and I know I would have sprung a big fat boner and wanted to jump her bones immediately. We're going to meet Wednesday night for dinner and hopefully by the weekend I'll be ready for a humungus fuck-a-thon with her. Of course condoms will be necessary until I get the "all clear" sign from the doc.

I awoke with some "morning wood" this morning and really felt like jacking it off but I resisted the temptation and just let "Junior" shrink down without giving him some exercise. The boners really don't hurt, feel as good as they usually do so I guess everything is working normally down there. Thank God it didn't make me impotent...not that I expected it to, but that is a universal worry with us guys! I'll be a good boy and do just what the doc says. The end result, condom free bareback fucking with no worries of pregnancy, will be well worth it!

Now I will shut the fuck up about that vasectomy except to say that I am sure glad that I didn't opt for that $199.95 laser vasectomy I saw advertised on late night TV. It apparently can have some "slight" complications as the cartoon below illustrates:


Anonymous said...

Ha I knew you would pull through it with little or no pain. Ah you will be back jerking and fucking like a rabbit soon enough,,,Bi for now - Bi Rob

Jess said...

Glad to hear you're doing fine! Here's to a speedy recovery :)

skunk said...

hehehe wicked blog !

and get well soon old man :D

Tara Tainton said...

Fascinating stuff. I've heard some men in great fear of the idea of a vasectomy and some who feel their sex life is rejuvenated afterwards. Very interesting to add your play-by-play experience to the mix.