Monday, March 12, 2007
Marcella Says It's Over!
Well I missed my usual Thursday morning post last week for good reason. No I didn't get caught jacking off in public you silly! The sad truth is that Marcella, the younger Filipino gal that I have been having a relationship with since last June has decided that it's time for her to leave yours truly the Horny Old Guy behind and move on. I was totally bummed out Thursday morning and really didn't feel like blogging about that or anything else for a few days but now it's about time for me to move on too. Writing about our little breakup will actually be therapeutic...I think!
Being a realist I was reasonably sure that our rather casual older guy-younger woman different races relationship was not going to last forever but I have to say the timing here caught me totally by surprise. I thought things were going extremely well between us and I had no clue that the shit was about to hit the fan. I've seen more than a few of my relationships dissolve (including my two marriages) and I almost always had some clues in advance that something disastrous was about to happen. Not this time! Marcy and I went on our ritual mid week dinner date last Wednesday night. She seemed her usual happy and friendly self at dinner and then still in my car in the parking lot of her apartment complex she gave me the bad news. "We need to talk Mike!" says she, "Oh oh!" says me! The funny thing was that the first thing that came to mind was that she found this fucking blog! That was not the case although the end result of our little talk was probably the same as if she had...no more Marcy and no more nookie for Mikey! Bummer! Shit! Damn the bad luck!
At first Marcy told me that it was because her parents didn't approve of her dating an older Caucasian guy. I already knew that since I met them at Christmas time and it was very apparent that they were not thrilled. Marcy confirmed that to me afterwards but didn't seem too concerned about it at the time. It sort of pissed me off when she told me that was her reason for breaking up at this stage of the game. I said something like "Jesus Christ Marcy! You're almost 39 years old! Isn't it about time you started living your own life! Who cares what your parents think?" She was not thrilled with that response. Then she confessed that there was a second reason. She has met some dude at Church.
Marcella's new admirer's name is Phillip and he apparently has three things going for him that I don't. He's younger than me (her age), he's Filipino, and he's Catholic! (Hey I bet I can eat pussy better than him!). She likes him a lot. He's also asked her to lunch. I suggested that we stay together until we see how things work out between her and Filipino Phil but she said she didn't want to date anyone else while she was with me and anyway it's just time for us to part. She was obviously sad about it, actually crying for a bit. It was not an enjoyable experience for either of us...but breakups are almost always like that. I told her to think about it for a while and I'd still be here if she changed her mind. We hugged and kissed and said goodnight and I drove home in a funk which I've been in ever since...at least up until now.
Marcy came by my place Sunday afternoon and picked up a few things she left here, a makeup kit, her toothbrush, a nightie she never wore and the iPod I gave her for Christmas. She said she hasn't changed her mind and I have the feeling that it is indeed over between us. Maybe it's just as well. I think I can speak for both of us when I say that it really wasn't love. We liked each other's company in and out of bed...a lot! We had fun together. Nothing at all wrong with that but you need more than that to live happily ever after. I really didn't have the same feeling for Marcy that I had for my first girlfriend Vicki in high school, my two wives (at least initially), or any of my other long term companions. No way that I could have asked Marcy to marry me and I'm reasonably sure that she would have turned me down if I did. I always knew there would be a day when I would reluctantly say "Well it was good while it lasted!" I didn't think that day would come so soon but I am pretty sure it is here! It's always sad when a lover walks out your door for the last time though...
It did indeed hit me a little harder than I expected it would, probably just because of the surprise factor. I didn't get much sleep the first couple of nights and the weekend was sort of a bummer knowing that Marcy wouldn't be here on any more weekends. Even jacking off a couple of times didn't help that much so you know that I was REALLY bummed out! However experience has taught me that time heals all wounds ...and this was a minor wound for sure. I feel much better this morning, even more so after putting my thoughts in writing. I may do one more post on Marcy but I'm not going to dwell on the breakup for long, in this blog or in my life. It's time to move on for both of us! I'll be back later in the week with more incoherent and hopefully more upbeat babbling. Have a good week y'all!