Monday, April 23, 2007

Flickr'n and Jerk'n!


I wish I had something more exciting to report on this Monday morning but it was just another ho-hum weekend for the three of us: me, my dick and my right hand. Yeah it's pretty pathetic but at my age I have to take my cheap thrills where I find them! As I've said here before fortunately the end result of jacking off is the same as with fucking...SPURT!...even if getting there definitely ain't as much fun. Oh well...

 My next door neighbor Charlie wants to fix me up with a blind date, a middle aged gal he works with. Charlie says we were made for each other. (What? She's a young, rich nymphomaniac?) I'm tempted but I have never had one blind date in my life that turned out well. On most of them, my date and I found ourselves to be anywhere from moderately to totally incompatible. I'm not criticizing my dates you understand. For the most part they were decent people but we just seemed to have little in common. One did truly turn out to be "the blind date from Hell" (she later ended up in jail!) Then I got involved in a six month relationship that never should have happened with another blind date. I should have beat a hasty retreat after that first dinner but as I've said many times before, a stiff prick has no conscience! In short, she was a carrying way too much life long heavy baggage...but she was also a babe!


I just don't like dates pre-arranged by other people. And yet when I wake up with morning wood and no place to put it...I may let Charlie fix me up after all! I may still try that Craigs List thing too, whatever the fuck that is! The last time I tried computer dating I sure wasn't thrilled with the results though, as the cartoon at left illustrates. I still have the feeling that something good may come out of my relationship with my fellow condo association board member and neighbor Kathy but that may take a while since Kathy has already told me that she's not interested in a relationship for a while after coming off of a bad long term one earlier in the year. We have a meeting at my place on Wednesday night to put together our first co-produced homeowners newsletter (remind me to keep my jack off pictures out of it!) and I'm looking forward to that of course! Maybe I can inch just a little bit closer to that red hair covered place I want to be. Only time will tell...but I may need something besides my right hand to tide me over in the meantime. I also have to face the fact that Kathy may not be interested in dating (or fucking) me even after she gets over her ex. No use putting all of your eggs in one basket eh? Whores and one night stands are still out of the question though. Been there, done that...but I ain't gonna do it ever again!


Saturday night I was feeling a combination of loneliness and horniness so I turned once again to Flickr for some visual inspiration for jacking off. I think I've mentioned THIS website before. It's a place where anyone can post their photographs for others to see. Anything from snapshots of the family and the family dog to travel photos to nude photos. Of course it's the latter which are of particular interest to the Horny Old Guy. Most of the nude photos are by amateurs or semi-pros but they are for the most part very high quality, many even artistic in nature. I find pictures of non professional semi-nude and nude women to be much more erotic than those you find in the men's magazines. To me those skin magazine pics look look all too similar and too airbrushed...just not natural! I'm not a fan of enhanced titties either. Nah, just show me the average woman without her clothes and I'll be one happy and horny camper...or jerker! I guess that's why I love the nude beaches so much. Breast size doesn't make any difference nor does having the perfect figure. Any size, any age, any race...I just love to gaze upon that naked female skin! I'd much rather look at the young woman behind the counter at McDonald's or the middle aged one sitting in front of me on the bus naked than the Playmate of the Month! Much more interesting and much more erotic...in my most humble opinion anyway!


So that was about it for my weekend folks! Flickr'n and jerk'n! Yeah I know...I really need to get a life! I'm working on that and you'll be the first to know when something happens. Until then, thanks as always for reading this boring crap! I'll be back later on in the week with more of the same!

8 comments:

sexybiguy said...

Well hello Mike and all Mike's friends. Well Mike you will not believe this but this Bi Guy finally setup his own blog. I have posted a short story, maybe you can go and check it out,,thanks

Mike Stewart said...

Attaboy Bi Rob/Bi Johnny! I hope you will enjoy blogging as much as I do! Check it out folks...if there is anybody hornier than yours truly it's this dude! Being bi he has twice as many chances of getting laid (or sucked!) too! His blog should be a hoot! Good luck my Canadian friend!

sexybiguy said...

Thanks for cumming over and checking out my blog Mike. Oh yes you can bet I will post my adventures on there..Bi Johnny

Anonymous said...

Mike all I can say is when I get as old as you I hope to hell I am that horny and so does my wife! Keep it up and sounds like you are doing just that. You are an inspiration to us all sir! Gregg

Jess said...

I think you kick ass Mike!

Mike Stewart said...

Thanks for those kind words Gregg and Jess! You both have very good taste! LOL

anonymous redhead said...

Oh, so those two have good taste, but when I compliment your blog I'm easily amused!? Just kidding, H.O.G., I know you like all of your readers and their comments, especially those of us with two sets of lips. And I really am easily amused!

Mike Stewart said...

Glad you understand darlin'! Ah just thinking of those two sets of lips...especially combined with lovely red hair! Thanks for the Sunday morning boner a.r. as well as for reading this silly ass blog! You do indeed have good taste!!!