Friday, May 04, 2007
Jacking Off...to Katie Couric?
Okay guys I have some bad news and some good news for you. The bad news is that I racked my brain and the best I could come up with for my "Celebrity Jack Off Fantasy of the Month" of May is Katie Couric (above). The good news is the runners up were Rosie O'Donnell and Hillary Clinton (below)...so it could have been MUCH worse! Oh God I'm in a silly mood this morning!
Actually I was thinking about who to award this great honor to last night and Katie came on the TV reading the news. I thought to myself "I wouldn't mind fucking that babe!" (a common thought for me with all the TV news women with the possible exception of CNN's Candy Crowley!) and then the light went on in my ancient brain. Yes! Katie will be my Jack Off Fantasy for May! For my readers in foreign lands (both of you!) who are not familiar with Katie, she was the long time co-host of the "Today" show which has been a very popular morning news and entertainment program here in America for decades. In 2006 Katie became the first female solo anchor on one of our "big three" national network evening news programs (and good for her for that!)
Katie has always had that sort of "girl next door" quality to her. Perky and nice as well as very smart, the kind of gal you'd like for a sister or an aunt (no incest jokes please!) as well as for a girlfriend or wife. She was also known for her short skirts on the Today program which displayed those lovely legs to full advantage. She doesn't look bad in a bathing suit either, does she? Yeah Katie was and is a babe! She is also 50 years old so don't say that I ALWAYS choose the young women for my celebrity jack off inspiration. Most of the time? Yup! But not always! I'd play "Hide the Salami" with Katie any day...and I have about as much chance of doing that as I do in becoming the next husband of Britney Spears! My fantasies will set me free though! Katie you da' woman for the month of May!
There was a little controversy over a photograph released by the network when Katie started her news anchor gig last year. The CBS network apparently used Photoshop or some other image manipulation software to take about 80 pounds off of Katie for a publicity portrait. See the results above. Hmmmm...well if Katie can use Photoshop, so can yours truly the Horny Old Guy! The "slightly adjusted" picture of me below right might come in handy if I start getting involved in computer dating! Come to think of it I better forget it. I might get sued for false advertising if things progress the way I hope they will if you know what I mean and I think you do! Hey I told you I was in a silly mood this morning!
If you guys can't get too inspired by Katie just check out "celebrity" in my index/label column at the right side of my blog. I suspect you'll find LOTS of inspiration for jerkin' there! Whatever your inspiration don't forget to join in the festivities in celebrating National Masturbation Month with the Horny Old Guy. That goes for all of you lovely women too...pull out those Hitachi Magic Wands (or whatever!) and come (cum?) to the masturbation party with us! Enjoy your bodies...and the weekend! Bye bye for now!